To change us
by TimeTurnerTessa
Summary: Tessa, after being brutally beaten, flees her brothers care. Only to stumble upon a much worse situation. When trouble arises in a dark London alleyway, she is saved by blue eyed and silver haired strangers. After the terrible ordeal Tessa just wishes her life would carry on, but she's about to find out, that that's not possible... Not with a blooming, treacherous romance.
1. Chapter 1

Tessa Gray ran down the cobbled streets of London fleeing her brother's mangy apartment. He'd hit her again. He promised he wouldn't but that was when he was sober. The harsh late November air stung as she tried to put as much distance between her and Nate and she wished she had at least pulled a shawl on.

The night was dreary and laughs were heard from nearby taverns. _Nate had been there only a few hours earlier, _she thought bitterly to herself. It hadn't been the worst beating she'd ever received, but it still was a beating and Nate usually resented it in the morning, however she'd had enough. Being a seventeen year old girl in Victorian times no one could care less of the life at home, no everything was about how you dressed in public, how you acted in public, never of your personal life, except if it was gossip.

_I will be gossip. _

So there Tessa was, wandering the grimy streets of London at three in the morning with a split lip, a hairstyle that was falling out and not an item of clothing to shield her from the icy air outside. She shivered as she stepped into an alley way, it was a relief to be out of the frozen wind but it was darker in the alley and Tessa had to squint to see her surroundings.

It was a small street between two weathered buildings the air was still and shouts could be heard from the pubs on the high, the shriek if a lady echoing between the walls where Tessa stood. It was still, not a stray rat or any movement at all. She squinted up, unable to see much farther than the buildings that towered above her she concluded that they were about five stories high. She felt small, which was an odd feeling as she was taller than most girls her age.

Tessa's grey eyes shone, despite the darkness, in fear.

All of a sudden she felt vulnerable, a girl alone on the streets of London, penniless, the situation couldn't get worse.

Just as Tessa slid down the brick wall to sit and finally let the tears consume her, three drunkards rounded the corner and into the alley where Tessa leaned against the wall.

At first they didn't seem to see her and for a fleeting moment she thought, no hoped, they'd passed by her remaining unnoticed, blending into the shadows.

But of course one of them in their drunken state lays his beady eyes on Tessa. He stopped his slouched walk and tapped his companions on the shoulders.

"Look what we have here." He nodded at Tessa.

Tessa slouched in exhaustion and acceptance, this was it. They would beat her, finish her off_. Why not, there's nothing much else that can go against me now! _She closed her eyes and felt the presence of the men pinning her to the wall. One of them stroked her cheek and her pale eyes shot open. He was smiling at her, his teeth were beer stained and Tessa felt queasy. His hands were rough and his finger nails grimy, liquor lingered around him, a smell she found particularly noisome.

Another of the men played with her hair like a cat with string. She wanted to run, but new that she was now trapped and her attempt would be futile; there was three of them and they were all bigger than her.

"Shall we have some more fun boys?" The one with gross teeth asked.

"Yes! That wench at the Tames wasn't worth those 4 pence." The beady eyed one exclaimed.

She now understood, they weren't going to beat her, they were going to violate her.

She screamed. Louder than he knew she could. A hand found its way onto her mouth and her scream was muffled.

"Shut up you whore." Said the quiet man, who until now hadn't touched her.

She was dragged away from the wall, she made every attempt to make it difficult for them, but there was three of them. She was pushed against the opposite wall, and one breathed down her neck, she could smell it. One of them was trying to unbutton her dress and was failing; so he ripped it off her, momentarily released from all holds of the men, she screamed.

One of them threw her onto the ground and sat on top of her, straddling her and her petticoat. He place a hand on her clothed breast and one on her mouth. The other men dropped to the dirty pavement and began to undress Tessa, she wriggled in attempts to get free, but the man on top of her slapped her and for a moment she was blinded. Tessa was now wearing nought but a thin underdress, the men began to touch her.

Her legs, her neck and her abdomen. The man who was sitting on top of her crushed his smelly mouth onto hers and she screamed into his mouth. He continued down her neck and Tessa screamed. He slapped her again and the tears began to fall.

She cried, for Nate, for herself and for her aunt.

Just as the man hopped of her and was about to rip her underdress off, a voice came from the opening of the alley.

"What's going on down there?"  
>Relief washed over Tessa and she screamed yet again, just to catch the voices attention. This earned her another slap.<p>

The man who's the voice belonged approached, one of the men stood up,

"Go away kid," he said gruffly.

The boy lifted up the man and threw him, but Tessa's view was obscured by the man on top of her, she still saw him crash against the alley wall.

She screamed again, drawing the boy's attention to her. The other two men were thrown away like garbage and Tessa curled into a ball. She sobbed and sobbed, eventually her saviour scooped her up just as she passed out. But before consciousness left her she saw the brightest most concerned blue.


	2. Chapter 2

Tessa drifted in and out of sleep, her dreams were filled with the brightest blue and the most vivid silver. Everything was magnified while she slept, like the nightmares; her brothers anger and the three men in the alley way.

Sometimes she'd open her heavy eyelids and see a golden ceiling before falling to sleep again, or the ceiling could be black. But it never varied between the two.

She eventually regained full consciousness and when she sat up she found herself in a large room, laying in a double bed, surrounded by heavy oak panels, a dresser, a desk and a fireplace.

She was confused, but then remembered the events of the previous night and whimpered in horror. The small sound triggered pain in her cheek, she wondered what on earth from. She got up and raced to the dresser that included a mirror. Her soft slender feet padding on the dark wooden floor that was surprisingly warm.

She gasped at her reflection.

There was a large hand shaped bruise on her left cheek. It looked several days old.

_Which is odd, because I was only beaten last night. _

She observed her face, her eyes were rimmed with darkness, and face looked shallow, her hair framed her pale face as it hang lankly. She wasn't surprised. Tessa in her relatively short life had looked much different; there was a time that Nate had beaten her so savagely that the black eye hadn't vanished completely until a few weeks later, rendering her constantly inside, while the few nice days London actually got, flew by.

Over the past few years Nate had been getting steadily worse, it wasn't that severity of the beating that had her fleeing last night, and it was the second that day. She'd had enough.

But Tessa felt, even though she was doing the right thing, felt like she'd betrayed Nate. He couldn't help being drunk, it's all he had, with the death of their parents and aunt, and having her thrust upon his responsibility. She felt guilty and knew she'd be in trouble when she returned to the mangy apartment they called home, but also knew it was her fault.

Turning away from the mirror she headed toward the large wardrobe and hoping there was something in it, she flung open the heavy doors.

She gasped, they were not the sort of dresses she was used to; second hand and tattered, these were fine and expensive, and they had bustles and silky materials and brilliant colours. She felt like she was invading someone's personal closet and hastily shut the doors.

Tessa jumped as a boy was standing in the doorway, she hadn't seen him as the closet doors had been blocking her view.

He was an odd and strangely beautiful boy. His hair was silver, his eyes were the same magnificent shade and his tall figure fitted his angled face. He was lovely to look at.

Tessa however realised she was only in her nightgown and was panic stricken.

"Do relax Ms Gray," Said the boy.

His voice was oddly calming. And despite the lack of propriety in the current situation she relaxed.

"My name is James Cairstairs, but everyone here calls me Jem." His voice was as smooth as honey, she listened to it as she studied his mesmerising face.

"Theresa," she replied "but I prefer Tessa."

He nodded, then said.

"You know that you can use these dresses," gesturing to the cupboard, "because I'm afraid to announce to you that my dear companion William Herondale will be very inappropriate, unlike myself, if you turn up to lunch wearing a night gown."

"But Mr Cairstairs," he frowned, "I can't stay for lunch, I must get back to my brother, he will be dreadfully worried you see I've not left him for a night alone before."

Jem raised his eyebrows and sat in the armchair by the fireplace, "I'm afraid Miss Tessa, you've been unconscious for longer than a day."

She stiffened at his words, how could it be longer than a day? That terrible alley scene was still so fresh. She thought of her brother, he would be furious.

She stood up straight and rushed to the cupboard, throwing it open she chose the simplest dress and threw it over her nightgown she buttoned it up in frenzy. Not bothering to look in the mirror she hastily tied her hair up.

Tessa seemed unaware of the boy who was watching her. He was smiling a little sadly.

She turned to Jem and said, "Thank you for your generous hospitality and the fresh garments but I really must be off."

She flew out the door and started down the high-ceilinged corridor, but within minutes she was lost. Another quarter of an hour later, exhausted, fed up and annoyed, she slid down a cold stone wall. It reminded her of the alley way of the men, and the situation she was not so long ago in. Tessa stood staring at the wall with terror, frozen as the memories of that night came flooding in.

She didn't see Jem approach her and screamed when his hand rested with her shoulder. He instantly drew it back and began to hastily apologise.

_Great Tessa now you've screamed at the only nice person in the world. _

Her exhaustion and frustration consuming her, she fell into his arms and closed her eyes, all she wanted was a hug, someone else to bear the weight on her shoulders with her. Jem did just that and pulled her into a warm and comfortable hug. A sobbed racked through her lean body, and Jem drew away. Holding her by the shoulders he held her so he could look into her face.

Tears streamed down it.

"Tessa, what's wrong?" He said kindly.

"You don't understand, he'll beat me for this. I'm seven feet under already."

"Tessa, you are safe here, no one here will hurt you or anything, and we'll protect you, always." Jem said this with so much sincerity that for once in her life she believed she was actually safe.

Then the door across the corridor opened, "What's going on out here, it sounds like someone's being murdered," and Tessa's grey eyes met the stunning blue ones again.

**Please don't hate me, William will defiantly be in the next chapter! I ship wessa so much, but I absolutely love Jem. Tell me what you think, love it? Hate it? Ideas? Anything's welcome I'd love to hear from you guys!**


	3. Chapter 3

**I am super sorry for the late update but I hope its extra good. I've been so busy over the holiday season, and mum has had and operation. Beware cliff hanger… Enjoy!**

Tessa buried her head once more in Jem's chest to escape the piercing blue gaze and sobbed a little more. She was utterly horrified at herself for such behaviour, especially in front of the new company. Tessa was so emotionally exhausted to care any further and stop herself.

She glanced up at Jem, who seemed to be having a silent conversation with the blue eyed boy, consisting off mouthing and eye rolls. He was cradling her back and, despite the stretch to the boundaries of propriety, Tessa felt very comfortable.

Quite suddenly Tessa pulled away from their embrace, missing his warmth, disgusted with herself. She was a lady for Christ's sake!

"I'm so sorry Jem, I never meant to act like this, I just need be going, my brother-"

"Tess," The way he said it made her fingers tingle and her neck warm, but it was not Jem, "the ordeal you have undergone and most truly survived, will always be a burden to bare and this fresh new wound to what is the most prettiest girl in all London, is such a sin all of Heaven frowns upon it, but they also applaud your strength, not many have the courage to run and accept. We do understand, you must be going through some rather dreadful stuff, but let me assure you Tess. We are here to help and no one blames you for your reaction."

The blue eyed boy spoke as if a well-read poet, and Tessa instantly admired him for it. She looked between the two boys her tears fast drying, Jem was smiling at the blue eyed boy.

Tessa decided to rectify the name situation as she couldn't call him blue eyes forever.

"What words of praise, to surely make me blush, how very flattering indeed, but I must know the name of my compliment maker as to thank a nameless fellow should be unwise and very rude. So pray, tell me your name?"

The boy broke out in a grin, "William Herondale." He said the grin still plastered to his handsome face.

Tessa smiled back at him and Jem observed the prettiest girl in all London make banter with his closest and most dear friend.

"Well Mr Herondale, I thank you most heartily for you kind words and praise. But if I remember correctly, I must thank you for something else also."

Will looked confused and Jem took the momentary silence to say, "There is an awful lot of thanking happening."

"Well Jem I supposed I have a lot to be grateful for." Said Tessa not unkindly and without affection.

"So what mademoiselle, are you thanking me for also?" Purred William. She shuddered invisibly inside, he was affecting her so differently, and she felt as if she was being pulled into a rich caramel liqueur whereas with Jem it was like dancing in a sun shower.

Tessa took a breath, if her suspicions were correct… "For saving me, from the drunkard in that horrible alleyway." Both Jem and Will looked surprised.

"How did you know it was me?" She instantly blushed, she was not under any circumstances going to admit that his intense eyes had burned themselves into her memory nor that fact that he smelt of moisture and ashes with something entirely his own, something spicy. Those two features were the only she actually could recall, she hadn't recognised his face but the eyes had been there.

"I recognised your face." The thing in subject fell but almost instantly returned to its playful smile, Jem also watching saw his face reduce very quickly into a small frown.

Will looked happy, this was a pleasure for Jem as William's life had been difficult. He watched as every time she spoke he would watch her as her curvaceous mouth spoke of her literary joys and love of poems. Jem had noticed to, that this girl was no doubt beautiful, she just didn't know it, which if possible made her even more so.

Her hair tumbled below her shoulders and her grey eyes penetrated anything that they were set on. The way she moved was graceful accept at sometimes when her calm demeanour would fade and she'd return to a clumsy little girl, Jem had noticed this, and he'd also noticed Will noticing this.

He left his thoughts and found himself in an empty corridor, he remembered briefly Will explaining that he was taking Tessa to the library, much to her joy. He stood up straight shook his head and walked toward his room coughing a few time before disappearing into his sanctuary.

Will loved the expression on her face as he led her into the library, it was worth four hundred pounds, no, it was priceless. Her eyes glazed over and her mouth went slack and she rushed over to one of the thousands of shelves of books.

"How do you find anything in here?" she asked, not looking away from the shelf.

"There's a registry," Will said simply.

She turned and smiled at him before returning to the shelf running her delicate hand down the spines.

He grabbed her dormant one and spun her away from her true loves, "Come on, I must show you something." He said in explanation. Tessa really had no choice but to follow, he led her along bookcases and upstairs around book filled corners to the top, overlooking the whole grand library. Tessa gasped in total awe.

"Will this is absolutely breath taking." He smiled in reply and taking her had again, tugged.

"Come on we're are not done yet." She resumed following him and he led her up another staircase, into a room.

They seemed to be behind a clock face, it was grimy due to the London weather but she could see for miles thanks to its transparency. London was at her feet, almost, big ben lingered in the distance, this clock was nowhere as big as that but still very high.

"Tess," Will breathed, she turned to find him very close to her, and as if under some magic pull she stumbled into his arms. "Tess, Tess, Tess." He leaned in and so did she, their lips mere millimetres apart when a loud scream of masculine pain rang through the building shaking the walls.


End file.
